Co-Parent a Teen After Divorce, and How Programs for Troubled Young Adults can Help
One of the most difficult situations to navigate is how to parent a troubled teen after a divorce — especially when the divorce is not amicable. With unstable and volatile relationships at play, communication lines are often broken and accountability is vague. Don’t let your teen slip through your fingers. There are options for parents to turn to, including wilderness therapy and additional programs for troubled young adults, which can provide great assistance during this transitional time in life.
With this helpful advice, you will be better equipped to parent your teen positively as a divorced parent.
If your teen shares time between two homes, it’s often the case that the rules of one home are undermined in the other – this gets serious when the mixed-messaging concerns contentious issues such as drinking alcohol.
But it’s not about playing the blame game. Both parents need to establish and agree to a consistent set of basic ground rules. No doubt, both sides will need to compromise. But doing so establishes transparency and uniformity about what parents expect of their teenagers. With everyone on the same page, it makes it more difficult for teens to leverage parents against each other and manipulate them. When you have clear guidelines and restrictions, there are fewer messy arguments about what your teen is and isn’t allowed to do.Share Responsibilities: Start With Your Strengths
Knowing who is responsible for what helps to ensure that your teen doesn’t slip through the cracks. If you think it’s your ex-spouse’s responsibility to address a certain issue with your teen and they think it’s yours, then your child won’t get the help they need.
Understand your individual strengths and build off those. It may even require saying a positive thing or two about your former partner. Be realistic about the things that your ex-partner can provide your child, and they’re likely to reciprocate in the same fashion.Divorced Parents In Particular Need Outside Help
When parents have not amicably separated, even beginning this conversation can be tough. It might be a good idea to involve an impartial third party, or communicate through writing about what you want for your teen. If speaking directly doesn’t work, finding another way is necessary if you really want to help your teen with their issues. It might even be beneficial for all parties to participate in some kind of common therapy—whether together or separate.
Co-parenting after a divorce is challenging – and the lack of communication puts your child at greater risk. Despite how difficult it may be to communicate with a former spouse, you both want the best for your child. Divorced parents need to establish clear boundaries and accountabilities for one another and for their teen – and should not try to co-parent in isolation: an experience third party such as a counselor or therapist can facilitate clear communication and help you successfully co-parent your teen.
Rites of Passage offers wilderness therapy adventures and additional programs for troubled young adults, which can provide great assistance during this transitional time in a teens life. Contact us today at (800)794-0980 to learn more.